"Irrinittu kaalu neeta" is an old Mallu proverb (Badly translaed as the Headline) but it holds true to toadys marketing atleast in the B2B industry.If you were to look for B2B Marketing on the web you would be overloaded with great advise on how to use the latest Web 2.0 tools for marketing your wares. Started with Blogs which in turn lead to social networking though MySpace, LinkedIn, Facebook and others- moved to instantly gratifying social microblogging through Twitter and now everyone talks about Friendfeed ,where you bring in all your social networks and tweets into one place. Every marketing guru worth his salt (or not) is preaching about the "real time" connect with the customers and how to make your blogs,corporate social networks and Twitter accounts "human" and constantly and actively "engage" him/her.
As a marketeer you might be forgiven to believe that the entire world has moved on from offline to online in the B2B space and you must be the last person who hasn't done it yet. Well im here to tell you ( suggest rather,I ain't no guru to tell!) that although all these gurus are preaching from Tokyo to Hawaii that the customers will not see you in favorable light if you are not present in the online space, they might not be completely accurate.
I think many B2B companies are still struggling with their basics and this becomes more and more evident when the going gets tough like in today's market scenarios. Especially in immature markets like LAM and APAC regions. When business is booming, everything looks hunky dory when you look at your sales books at the end of the quarter. But when going gets tough, customers are deffering purchase decisions and delaying payments you are faced with realities. Did you get your basics right in the first place?
I haven't done any official market research but when i talk to my peers about how well they know their markets, I'm hearing a common voice - We really don't know the market out there. There are a million leads every sales guy or sales manager is sitting on but having no time or resources to work on it. And all of that potential gold mine is down the drain. I think most B2B companies still think daily sales (Which of course is necessary for any company to run) and forget there is need to understand how to channel their efforts to actually DO the Sale. Show me a Sales Manager who knows/is learning the insides of his market rather being the top Sales Guy of the team and Ill show you an exception to the rule.
Take a step back, think simple - know your strengths- identify your target markets and learn everything there is to know about them. Know all the players in these segments, identify the issues with each stakeholder (End User,Consultant,Contractor etc) and rationalise to them in clear terms how your prodcut/service is going to solve their problems. And for all these you need face time or atleast phone time- Mano-a Mano and not online lead generation. Everyone deals with a zillion tools daily in their line of work and no one wants to fill one more online survey. They want answers and the more personal it is the more confident they feel. So put your money first into the good old offline marketing department. This is not to say online is not the future but check out this year's marketing spends the consultants are recommending and you'll see what i mean. Get real, Get personal, Get business. Or find yourself on the floor rubbing your behind...
The Bush Shoe who started the SHIT (Shoes and Heels International Takeover of planet earth) Association has called for a global press conference in some undisclosed hideout in Af-Pak. All the global media have been blind folded ,scrutinized - checked for bugs,bombs, GPS trackers etc and brought to this cave somewhere in the beyond of nowhere.
Out comes the infamous Bush shoe although its really hard to make out if its really him. He's completely changed. With a full beard, and white turban adorned over his head he walks cockily in front of the world media and takes the chair at the head of the conference table(Don't even ask how in the world did a conference table ,LCD projector and a laser pointer show up in a cave).
"Allahuakbar-OmNamashivaya-PraisetheLord-Atheists ruleeee" chant is the opening line of Bush Shoe. "My dear beloved media of the world. You must be all wondering why I have called you all today? Don't worry . All your curiosity will be laid to rest in a few moments. You would all have seen how I daringly attacked the most powerful man on the planet a few months ago. You also would have been seeing more recently how my friends Chidambaram shoe and Jindal shoe have done our organization proud by attacking their namesakes. And the question in every man,woman and child's man is WHY? "
"Well the answer is very simple. We, the shoes and heels on this planet have been tread upon, exploited,walked over,kicked,beaten and tyrannized for centuries now. We who sought to protect delicate humans and their delicate feet have been subjugated to gross injustice and shoe rights violations. There was a time when there was a symbiotic relationship between the shoe kind and human kind. We were made out of love and hard work with human hands. Made specifically for the humans we were to call our mate for life. Polished daily as nourishment, stitched when hurt and kept in soft boxes when we grew old.But with time Human kind has lost all its heart. The cruelty has taken over all its kindness and gentle attitude towards us. We are now made by robots and machines ,subjected to genetic experiments by mixing of our natural skin with god knows what kind of synthetic skins and even after that our hardships only begin. We are thrown around, never polished and even if polished done so by unhealthy toxic liquid polish which suffocate us but most importantly the umbilical relationship we shared with human kind has been severed."
"Starting from the day we are put us on they feel our bite because we were never made specifically for our human mate but instead mass produced.(Clearly a mistake of the human kind) and we are made to suffer for this. They show us around to their friends for a few days and out comes the newer models and they forget us like rags. We remain unpolished,hidden in the darkest closets filled with rats who nibble at us day in and day out. After a few years while cleaning those closets they find us and instead of stitching our wounds and taking care of us, we are guttered and thrown into the rubbish."
"Enough IS Enough!!! We the Shoes and Heels of the world have decided to seek revenge for all the injustice meted out to us and seek to restore our rightful place as rulers of this planet. It is with this intention I have started the SHIT Association and the SHIT Movement across the world. After I attacked Bush I could convince all the Shoes and Heels in the world to unite against the common enemy and I told them - In less than an hour, aircrafts from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest aerial battle in the history of shoekind. "Shoekind." That word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can't be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps it's fate that today is the Fourth of July, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom... Not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution... but from annihilation. We are fighting for our right to live. To exist. And should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day the world declared in one voice: "We will not go quietly into the night!" We will not vanish without a fight! We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day! "(Applause fills the rooms,goosebumps everywhere)
"And it is with this intention we have declared out right war on the human race. You can see our squadrons are sent out around the world. Across the Atlantic to Europe, Out to the East to China and Japan. Our troops recently infiltrated the Indian borders and attacked their leaders in plain sight. All of this is with one and only one intention. We will be the Rulers of the Universe. Hahahahahahahahahahaha!!! " Any Questions?
One lady journalist from the press raises her hand. "Afternoon sir, I represent DNA newspaper in India where Chidambaram shoe and Jindal shoe recently attacked our leaders. Although you are calling yourself and your cadets heroes, isn't it true that all of you infact failed in your missions as you never touched any of the leaders and they remain unharmed. What is our comment on this?"
Bush Shoe -" Hahaha - This is the idiocy of the human kind I'm talking about. Those were not failed missions but great successes. Those missions were not our attacks. Those missions merely were a warning to the entire human race that we can attack anyone anywhere at our will. Remember FEAR is the key in any war. We want to put the fear of SHOES in all human kind and scared out of their pants they are, right now....Next question"
Another journalist raises his hand - "Mr Bush Shoe, even though you are calling yourself the Shoes and Heels ......Association, we haven't seen heels in action.Would you say your organization is gender biased?"
Bush Shoe - " Foolish Man. Heels are an integral and key part of our organization. Infact I would even go ahead and state it on record they have been trained to be supreme assassins through the centuries of attacks they have dished out to all the human males by their spouses/girlfriends/mothers. They are our second and most deadliest line of attack. They infact- BOOOOM!!!
A small explosion occurs in the room and the chair where Bush Shoe was sitting is blown to smithereens. Everyone tries to get out but the Shoe cadre blocks the exits. Theres a lot of commotion and screaming in the room and dust flying everywhere. Slowly the dust settles and the Bush Shoes dead body is lying on the floor with blood still oozing out. Someone breaks down the door from outside and in walks Osama with his men. "Hahahahaha - Bush Shoe, whose the Ruler of the Universe now?", Osama screams. "Go back to your leaders , o people of the media, and tell everyone everywhere ,who the real ruler of the world is."
Suddenly the video screen drops out behind the conference table (Again do not ask). And a camera comes on. We can see the image of a man who looks like the Bush Shoe and he starts to address everyone - " HahahahaOsama, you ignorant asinine prick. You really think I would fall for that trap. That was just my double. You will pay dearly for this , you will pay with your life for this, OSAMAAAAAAAAA!!!!"
Sorry for the awfully long post. I got a bit carried away I guess by the Shoegates. Hope you enjoyed it though.
All the world's a fool, Fooled into selecting their governments, Governments fooled into choosing their policies and policy makers Who get fooled by the war mongers to wage never ending wars, War mongers who are fooled by the terrorists who feed them, Terrorists who are fooled by their leaders into believing this war has a meaning, Leaders who are fools to believe that there are Gods watching us, All the world's a foolMen and women are fools in love Fools to believe in the Valentine's days and the April Fools days Promoted by the marketing guys to make a buck Marketing guys who are fooled out of their bonuses Bonuses which fool the Big shots into Bank assets which are not worth the paper they are written on. Doesn't the world know better than - that the buck never stops Making a fool of everyone. All the world's a fool. All the children who were having fun, Fooled into education to spoil the fun, Education fooled them into a (rat) race, A race which fooled them into working more for a promise, A promise which said if you worked , you could have all the fun. Wasn't it what the children were having my friend? All the world's a fool.
Inspired to write my first poetry on questions that sometimes pop up in my mind. There are plenty more but I felt sleepy to write more. I know I know, its an insult to poetry but I thought why not give it a shot. For I'm just being a fool. And by the way Happy Fools Day.:-D
Six months after the brutal murder of Soumya, the Delhi police claim to have found the murderers. It seems its a gang of thieves who have also been involved in the murder of another Delhi BPO employee,Jigisha.
What's really crazy is to see the comments made by the people below the news article, in which they say women shouldn't work at night or in jobs which might provocate these elements. I read it and it irks me to no small measure. And then i think, will I be happy about sending my mother,daughter,girl friend or wife out in the night alone in the streets of Delhi and I cannot seem to completely disagree with the essence of these comments. That's the sad state of affairs for the security of women in the country.
New year came and went by and I didn't write a word. Not for lack of events definitely. I would even go so far as to declare my 2009 welcome as my best new year welcome ever. A lot has happened in 2 months but alas blogging hasn't been one of them. New job, new yet old base, new additions to the family, travel for work and travel for pleasure,cutting out of rice in my diet and an geometrically progressing job description being part of the incomplete list.
I'm happy to no end and pissed and frustrated on the other end. Although i would say happy wins this time over. However my mind has gone blank in regards to blogging so I thought I needed to regain control and pen something, anything down.
Elections are around the corner, Obamania is slowly winding down with the realization that he might not have all the answers after all (What a surprise!), Taliban's slowly taking over Pakistan, LTTE is slowly being extinguished, Phelps had a joint (Big deal I had one too- didn't make me an 8 time olympic gold winner), pink chaddis were gifted to Muthalik and ilk. The world moves on whether I'm blogging or not. So why not let my mind wander and think again of what is,what can be,what shouldn't and be the boss of my own spiel. Amen!
Mumbai again is at the epicentre of attack. It might be one of the biggest attacks ever made by terrorists so close to home. The shock of the world and the country is expected and so is the delayed response by the politicians and the maybe even the unpreparedness of our defences (God bless the souls of the the brave cops who gave their lives to save the hostages). But this post is not about blasting terrorists into smithereens, parading of the Spirit that is Mumbai or blaming the government and armed forces of its incompetencies. No , my friends this post is trying to see from a personal perspective what the root cause of this evil, this terror is.
Terrorism, knows no country boundaries as we have clearly seen in the past decade. Where does this terrorism get its fuel? Where does it get the funding? Where does it get its terrorists. And more importantly where does it get its origins ?
I'll start with the origin. I truly believe that terrorism is what you get when you mix power and money hungry people without a conscience with socially outcast or discriminated people with a weak mind(whether rightfully or wrongfully). In a way its marketing 101 and supply and demand at work. People who make guns and other weapons want to sell more and more weapons. How do you do it ? Influence the need of the target segment by satisfying the want. Target segment - Socially discriminated people with fickle minds, who feel the need to get back at society for what's being done to them. The "suits" tell them, here you go- the latest weaponry technology can provide. Want meets need. Job well done. But then there are not enough people with the need. So what now? Create the need. Create leaders for these groups of people to motivate people on the edge over to their side and brainwash more and more daily. Now you have a steady set of people who keep falling into the need trap and keep taking it to demand stage by plundering and plummaging. How else could you describe the coming up of a new faction of Islamic jihadi group every week?
Now over the past decade ,I feel it has so transpired that Muslims have had to bear the brunt of this discrimination the most. They are the second largest religion in the world. Their customs and practices are different from the western world. And being different scares people. I'm sure it all started with a small disparity against them somewhere. A group of them got together disgrunted and took adverse action. This brought about greater racism against Muslims from a bigger group of ignorant fools who don't differentiate between the person, the action and the religion. This further hurt the sentiments of the the weak and fickle minded among the ones who are discriminated against. More people fight back and the vicious circle starts. Now take these ignorant nonsecular fools (who don't differentiate action and religion ) and the fickle minded people and add the fuel of weapons manufactuerers while making them leaders on the world stage. George Bush and Osama bin Laden come to mind as two examples. Now you have this spiral going out of everyone's control. Cause Bush thinks that all Muslims should be killed and Osama thinks all things American burnt.
Who wins? who loses? First answer very guessable. Check the brand names of the latest companies manufacturing weapons. Laughing all the way to the bank.
Who loses? each and every single one of the 6 billion people on the planet.
Why?Coz, We didn't have the sense to understand that the action and person are separated from the religion and hence kept on discriminated against them. We didn't have the ability to be Secular.
I am born a Hindu, raised a Secular. Infact if I look closely at my circle of friends , I would have more friends from other religions than Hinduism. We are a Secular, Socialist, Democratic, Republic country. These are the words from the Constitution. Its no wonder Secular came first in the list because without that India would have split into a million pieces by now. First question many westerners ask when they meet me, Are you a Muslim ? I feel so tempted to tell them I am and see their reaction. Instead I tell them I'm a Hindu. They look relieved. Not because Hinduism doesn't breed its own terrorists. Just that the Hindu terrorism has not reached them. But do you think in this current scenario the war mongers will not encourage the Hindu fickle minded youth retaliate? Once that happens, Should me or my children fear to tell the truth as many Muslim men, women and children feel ? Or should we unite and say once and for all - Every religion has a right to exist peacefully and we will stop discriminating against any one of them.
Does playing the blame game with one another solve the situation or increase the rift? Will we let the war mongers get away with blood money of our family, friends and neighbours. Or will we use our heads, show our strength, our secularness - and use TOLERANCE for all things different as the greatest weapon against terror? That's when I would say we live in a globalized world.
SoumyaVishwanathan along with 5 other Indian journos were honoured at the Stockholm Journalists Memorial 2008. Read the full story here Whats specially disheartening to read is that the no one from the Indian embassy in Stockholm felt it fit to join in the bereavement. Are you seriously telling me that the elite bureaucracy in Stockholm representing India are so overloaded? Disgraceful is the word that comes to mind.
Well this could feel like a continuation of the last blog post on Change and it might well be one, but its just seems that time of the year. New year's around the corner and things change.
This blog post is dedicated to the heroes of my generations childhood. The ones whom we pinned all our hopes on after coming back from a exam gone horribly wrong, after suffering mom's beating for being up to some mischief, fights with our siblings ; all things bad for a child- to sit in front of the tele and smile and cheer again. This post is dedicated to the Fab Five (not just 4)of Indian cricket. SachinRameshTendulkar, RahulSharadDravid,SouravChandidasGanguly, VangipurappuVenkataSaiLakshman and AnilKumble.
We have grown up watching these amazing athletes play for the country in a sport that is a religion in India. Cricket is what football is to Brazil and Argentina. Half the office goes on sick leave, shops shut early,housewives forego their soaps for the day, buzzing streets have an eerie silence, fathers come home early, and it might not be far from the truth to say that even crime rates drop when India is playing cricket. Such is the euphoria,the ecstasy,the pain and sheer heartburn associated with the sport. Everyone over the age of 5 is commentator and an expert cricketer. He shouldn't have cut the ball like this but driven it like that, what was he thinking bowling a full toss?? I'm sure if the comments made by Indians while watching the game could be stored in a database, it would run into trillions of terabytes.
These 5 athletes have brought out the best and worst in all of us. We have celebrated their centuries and 5 wicket hauls as much as we have crucified them for their bad days. Lauded as Gods of something or something one day and effigies burnt the next. Still they have persevered. For the last nearly two decades or so they have come to become part of our families like siblings whom we love to hate and hate to hear any criticism from an outsider with equal fervour.
I'm sure plenty of sports writers and commentators will be saluting these cricketers and describing their achievements and records(for they can fill 5 books each) but for myself and my generation its near that time to bid adieu to Fab Five bunch. I'm sure they have plenty of cricket left in them as you don't lose your greatness even when your body is creaking and screaming for you to stop with such athletes. But its better to leave gracefully than to be kicked out in the ungracious fashion which international sport is used to. AnilKumble-619 Test wickets and 337 ODI wickets as he hangs up his boots. Finishing off as captain of the country and a near impossible to duplicate 10 wicket haul. You have won us many a match for us with your always criticized "non spinning" spin bowling.You have shown every kid who dreams of playing for their country what it means to be a gentleman of the sport. You have toiled harder and longer than humanly possible and played with a heart so large for the country that no one can touch you.
SouravGanguly-7,127 Test runs and 11,363 ODI runs and 132 combined wickets plays his last day of Test cricket tomorrow. The most successful test captain India ever saw, your aggression was a welcome change from the soft Indian sides of yore. Personally not my favorite but admittedly the sheer elegance of your off side shots a treat a to watch. You brought about a breath of much needed fresh air into the captaincy of India and as is usual had to suffer for it too. And you proved it with your comeback in the best way an cricketer can-with your bat doing the talking.The pride of Bengal,The Prince of Calcutta, the Maharaja of Indian cricket , We will miss you. VVSLakshman- Very Very Special Lakshman. This sobriquet defines you absolutely. The proof that laziness is grace in motion too. To watch you play effortlessly making it look so easy and turning fools of the ones who believe it to be too. Coming in whenever we are down in the dumps and given up all hope and coming on top with an innings which is never short of miraculous. You make us watch the game after all hope of victory is gone and an agonising defeat is staring at our face and turn the agony into pure ecstasy. And then you go on to do it again and again and again... RahulDravid. The Wall. Test cricket batting defined. Did you follow the rulebook on cricket or did they MAKE the rulebook watching you play? The one whom the country depends on when we are out of home and out of sorts. You made sure repeatedly that India were not described as "Lions at home and kittens on international waters". You made us believe that we were safe as long as you stood your defiant ground. And we worshipped the ground you stood on.Every budding cricketer wants to play that cover drive down on his knees like you do and will always wish they could.
SachinTendulkar. God. That's what this man is to Indian cricket. Even mentioning that he might retire from cricket one day might bring millions of hate mails at my doorsteps. I can't write enough about a man who has inspired a billion people every game he has stepped out to play for the country. Undeniably the best cricketer the world has seen not just for his game but the sheer power of his mind to take on the hopes of a billion people day in and day out. There might(just might) have been better batsmen in the world but none of them had to go through the pressure outside the cricket field that you have gone through. From a tender age of 17 to an age where your kid knows why a country worships you, you have proved what it means to represent a country in international cricket. I'm sure a 100 books have been written on your past ,present and future and 100 more will be written. You are India's Pele,Maradona,Jordan,Schumacher, Tiger Woods all rolled into one. I know a country will cry the day you retire and wish time would turn back and give us our greatest sportsperson (not just athlete) ever back.
And time is fast approaching for the remaining three to bid their farewells from the game too. I'm sure the young guns will take over from your able hands the pride of donning India's colours on the modern day battlefields of international sport. But for my generation the chants will be heard by our children and grandchildren that they weren't as good or as great as you. Cricket is our religion and you,the Fab Five have been our Gods. We Thank you!
Yes ,Barack Hussein Obama is the new president of the US of A. Dawn of a new Generation. Hmm sounds like a Pepsi tag line. Oh wait Pepsi has a new logo too. Rebirth of a Drink. Thinking of rebirths- Japanese scientists have cloned dead frozen mice. Whoa...Change hear we come. Back to Obama again. The circle of life continues...
Lets see what changes are brought about by these 3 completely unrelated events. First Black(ok semi black) president of America with a Muslim sounding name. On his shoulders lie the twin burdens of the biggest economic crisis in history and the biggest war against terror. They say if we had used the $700 billion dollar crutches for greater good we could have alleviated world poverty.So even less needs to be said about $3 trillion for the war in Iraq and Afghanistan. Change was definitely needed from Bush. But what the bloody hell that change is going to be(Obama has never be clear about that) is any one's guess. The story will unfold itself. On a side note its funny(or not!) how many people today told me that they expected Obama to be assassinated within 3 years.
Like we said change is good. Or is it? Case in point- Pepsi's new logo or logos in plural. The Smiling Logo, the smirking(or grinning) logo and the laughing logo. All for the same brand. Is this a first? Different(slightly) logos of the same brand? Maybe some of the readers can clarify. Anyways when profits are down, a $1.2 billion spent on new logo which has not been radically changed since the 50's(I mean the circle of red and blue with a centre wave) doesn't seem the smartest of all moves. A basic definition of a logo is to uniquely visually identify a brand,company or product. Three logos for the same brand seems like confusing the customer to me. Emotions with logos or brands are excellent for brand identity but are you telling me a Pepsi customer identifies with the smile, The Diet Pepsi one with the grin and the Pepsi Max customer with a laugh? You must be kidding me. No pun intended. Taking different logos to line extensions is definitely a stretch. Have Pepsi's marketing team all done all that could be done before embarking on this great mission ? Or was someone's office joke taken seriously by top management? Let see what this change ushers, hey I'm no marketing guru. BTW did Nooyi vote Democrat , if you know what i mean?
Finally a change that sci-fi novelists have written about for years. Bringing back the dead.Literally. Japanese scientists have brought back from the dead or rather cloned a frozen mouse who has been buried 6 feet under(of ice mind you) for 16 long years. Now they are talking about bringing back the Mammoth. Jurassic Park here we come. It does sound really cool though doesn't it. What will happen next? Wait and watch - the best (or worst) is yet to come. Ode to Change!!!
Pic:Obama pic courtesy CNN.com Pepsi logo courtesy Brand New blog
Well its Diwali time again. New clothes, firecrackers and lots of yummy food...I can understand the issues critics have with all the noise and smoke and people getting hurt during diwali, but it just ain't the same without firecrackers. Would have been great to have some company also though.
Hope this Diwali brings cheer, happiness and prosperity to my family and friends and to each and everyone out there and here's to hoping that we keep the "spark" burning bright in our lives as Chetan Bhagat said in his speech.
